Sunday, September 18, 2011


You know when God wants you to pay attention to something so badly that its like he literally smacks you in the face with it?!  Well, I feel like this is happening to me! 

I’ve wanted to get involved in some sort of Bible study for some time now.  But when, where, about what…I worry about those details.  I want it to be the “right” Bible study.  I want to study something relevant to me.  I want to be in a study with cool, young people my age.  I want to be in a study that won’t take time away from my time with Kevin.  Those are the things I’ve been worried about…let’s talk about out of line priorities, right?!  Well, a few weeks ago at church there was a Bible study going to start for “women” on Friday mornings and it was going to be on 1 Samuel.  I thought about it.  I thought things like, I don’t have anything going on Friday morning, it doesn’t take time away from my time with Kevin, its for “women”…so far it met my requirements.  But then I also thought things like, its for “women” that means there are going to be old ladies there that I will have nothing in common with and there stuff won’t be relevant to my stuff (and vice versa), and things like, 1Samuel?!  What do I care about a time of war and switching from judges, to priest, to a king?  Again, wonderful attitude, right?!  Well much to my weariness, I decided to buy the book and go.

The first week we were suppose to come prepared, meaning that we were suppose to have at least read the entire book of 1Samuel.  Well my usual procrastinating self waited till Thursday to worry about this.  Then I started to freak myself out.  One of my greatest fears in life is looking dumb in front of others (yes, I know its very shallow we will get to that another time).  So I started to freak myself out and worry.  For those who don’t know, I don’t have a great reading comprehension nor do I remember a lot about things that don’t really peak my interest.  People’s names I’m great at, Bible stories not so much.  Well my attitude working against me, I finished reading through 1Samuel and much to my surprise, remembered a lot if it! 

Well to make what could be and sort of already is a long story short this Bible study with older “women” that is on 1Samuel (which by the way is about way more then war and leaders) has been such a blessing for where I am at in life right now.  We are only two weeks in and still discussing the first two chapters but man, God has been talking to me!

As I’ve suddenly mentioned before, Kevin and I are now in the process of trying to have children.  Even though we have only been trying for a couple of months each time I get my monthly “gift” I get so disappointed.  I get a little angry with God.  I, for whatever reason, thought I would be the person that got pregnant right away, no wait, no problem (not that there is a problem, at least that we know about…other then impatient ness) but I apparently was wrong.  If you don’t know, the first two chapters of 1Samuel are about Hannah and her longing for a child.  She was barren and though her husband loved her very much, she still longed for a child.  What hit home to me is that Hannah could have been mad, she could have been bitter at God but instead she gave it up to Him, fully.  She laid it at His feet and walked away.  And God blessed her!  He gave her a child.  Not right away, but in due time.  And you know what, she had made a deal with God.  She promised that if He gave her a child that she would give that child back to Him and that his whole life he would be God’s…and she followed through with it!  Can you imagine?!  You desperately want and pray for a child, God answers that prayer, and then you have to give it up.  Oh man!!!  Talk about a dedicated women!

The reason this hits home so much is because, well were trying to have a child, but also because I have been so impatient and I’m not sure I have fully given this struggle to God, laid it at His feet, and walked away from it.  I still worry about this and that.  This detail, that detail.  If we get pregnant now that would be great because of “this”.   It’s all about me and what works for my life.  But you know what, its not about me and what works for my life.  If you change on detail of Hannah’s story, have it be the wanting so desperately or a child that she makes a deal with God, the timing, the location, whatever it is, if you change one detail, Samuel’s life wouldn’t be Samuel’s life.  I guess the point of me telling you all this is to reiterate to myself what we all really already know, God’s timing and plan is perfect!!! It doesn’t matter how much we want it, how perfect we think the timing is for it, how much we deserve it, or how ready we think we are for it, for whatever reason it isn’t perfect in the timing of the Lord!  And really, does my perfectionist of a self want it if it’s not perfect?! 

So my challenge to myself, and whoever else reads this blog, is to trust in the Lord.  Trust in His timing.  But also to take whatever it is, whatever you are struggling with to the Lord!  Pray about it with Him, cry about it with Him, get angry about it with Him….do whatever you have to do to get it out of your system with the Lord in prayer and then LEAVE IT!  Leave it as His feet!  Don’t worry about it, wonder about it, obsess about it…just leave it!  And trust that God’s plan and timing is better then we could ever imagine or put together ourselves. 

***Side note:  I’m sitting at a table with mostly older women and am LOVING it!  Hearing their thoughts, stories, and insight has truly been a blessing!  I wouldn’t change my table for anything!  (Go figure, right!)

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Holiday special!!!!

Hey all!!!  
Just thought I would let you know about the great special I have running for the holidays!

Lets book a shoot today!!!!

P.S.-I can create and print CHRISTMAS POSTCARDS for an additional fee!